Fun Things to Do at Wal-Mart
shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them
at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the
front of the store.
3. Set all alarm clock to go off at ten minute
intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; try to
see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the
entire auto department by sampling all of the spray air
6. Challenge other shoppers to duels with tubes of gift
7. Leave cryptic messages on all the typewriters.
Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When people are behind
you, walk REALLY SLOW; especially while in thin, narrow aisles.
Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "There is a Code 4 in Housewares, son. You know what you have to do."
handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he
knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as
12. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
13. In the
automotive department practice your 'Madonna" look using various
14. Two words: "Marco Polo"
15. Attempt to fit into
very large gym bags.
16. Attempt to fit others into very large gym
17. Pay off Lay away fifty cents at a time.
around suspiciously humming the theme from "Mission:
19. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to
direct me to your Twinkies?"
20. Re-alphabetize the CDs in
21. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked
22. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in pet food
23. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker,
assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices
24. Set up a 'Valet Parking' sign in front of the store.
25. Drag a lounge chir over to the magazines and relax. If the
store has a food court, buy a soft drink. Explain that you don't get out
much and ask them if they can put a little umbrella in it.
all the radios stations to a Polka station, then turn them off and
increase the volume to 'max'.
27. While walking through the
clothing department, ask yourself loudly enough for everyone to hear, "Who
BUYS this crap anyway?"
28. Repeat number 27 in Jewelry Department.
29. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you
in forever..." etc.See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
30. Play with the automatic doors.
31. Ride a display
bicycle through the store. Claim you're taking it for a 'test
32. Ask other shoppers if they have any Grey Poupon.
33. Test the fishing rods to see what you can "catch" from the
34. TP as much of the store as possible.
Put M&Ms on Law away.
36. Set up a tent in the camping
department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows
from Bed & Bath.
37. Randomly throw things into neighboring
38. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and
ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
39. Play with all
of the calculators so they say 'hello' upside down.
40. Drape a
blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, "I am Batman! Come,
Robin--to the Batcave!"
41. Follow people through the aisles,
always staying about five feet away. Continue to do so until they leave
the department or you are escorted out by security.
42. Play soccer
with a group of friends using the entire store as your playing
43. Move "Caution:Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
44. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between
them yelling, "Red Rover!"
45. Take up an entire aisle by setting
up a full scale battle between GI Joes and the X-Men.
bets on the above battle.
47. Nonchalantly 'test' the brushes and
combs in Cosmetics.
48. Make up nonsense products and ask newly
hired employees if they have any in stock, e.g. "Do you have any Shnerples
49. When someone steps away from their cart to look at
something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say,
**Bonus- Try to do them all in one visit - **