How to be Annoying at a Restaurant
Pretend to be a
foreigner and use broken english to order your food. Use the wrong words for
everything (Example: "Yes, hello, I would alike some uh oh thems hot cats with
tunabutter and uhh some of the uh crackcocaine.)
When the waitress comes to
your table with the drinks you ordered, jump to get yours while knocking over
all of the other drinks spilling water everywhere.
Drop your fork onto the
floor beside you. Then bend down to try to get it but hit your knee on the
underside of the table with your head very close to the table to try to get the
effect that you bent down fast to pic up your spoon and you slammed you head on
Cough at people with a mean look.
At a fancy restaurant and
chew your ice very loudly with your mouth open. Try to get pieces of ice to fly
out onto the table.
Go into a fancy restaurant and pretend you just got back
from the dentist and he had just given you tons of Novocain.
Leave fake dog
poop in the seat.
Flirt with a waiter of the same sex and try to get extra
Take off your shoes and put them on the table neatly beside
Order your food and then change your mind over and over and over again
until you get kicked out.
Say "Man this looks exactly like a chicken's
Walk out of the bathroom and say "Man its smells FRESH out
Walk out of the bathroom and say "Man that was a STRUGGLE!!"
Order the most expensive thing on the menu and send it to someone on the
other side of the room saying, "They are to shy to order themselves, just put it
on their bill."
Order wine (if you're of age) and smell the inside of the
bottle after it is opened and say, "Is there any POOP in this? Sure smells like
Order: "Your most expensive meal, stuffed with your 2nd most
expensive meal" (This will likely be something like "steak stuffed with tacos" )
Go to a nice restaurant and sit down at a table alone and when the waitress
comes to take your order lean back in your chair and just fall back and take the
table cloth with you. Then get up and ask for a different chair because you
think the one you sat in was defective.