25 Signs You're Getting Old
1. You're asleep, but others worry that you're
dead.
2. Your back goes out more than you do.
3. You quit trying to hold
your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.
4. You buy a compass for
the dash of your car/truck.
5. You are proud of your lawn mower.
6. Your
best friend is dating someone half their age, and isn't breaking any laws.
7. Your arms are almost too short to read the newspaper.
8. You sing
along with the elevator music.
9. You would rather go to work than stay home
sick.
10. You enjoy hearing about other people's operations.
11. You no
longer think of speed limits as a challenge.
12. People call at 9:00 p.m.
and ask, "Did I wake you?"
13. You answer a question with, "Because I said
so."
14. You send money to PBS.
15. The end of your tie doesn't come
anywhere near the top of your pants.
16. You take a metal detector to the
beach.
17. You know what the word "equity" means.
18. You can't remember
the last time you laid on the floor to watch television.
19. Your ears are
hairier than your head.
20. You talk about "good grass" and you're referring
to someone's lawn.
21. You get into a heated argument about pension plans.
22. You got cable for The Weather Channel.
23. You can go bowling
without drinking.
24. You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize
it.
25. People send you this list.